Worry is the basis of all imagined fear.
One of which is fruitless as it often doesn’t change the outcome.
The only way out of worry is, see what is causing the concern. Is it an imagined concern or one that has deeper feelings that are causing this worry?
Worry sometimes can be something we think we did not or not, creating blocks in the immediate energy. It blocks the flow of life and love.
During this time, it is essential to surrender all to the Divine. Imagine a hot air balloon and putting all your worries and feelings and anything you have no control over, into it, and give it all up. It helps to release the need to control and allow things for just as there are. We can only modify ourselves and make choices that work for us, what is meaningful to us what is worthwhile. This is what’s called ling a sacred life.
Forgive yourself and the other for any hurt or harm caused. We can’t change the outcome based on what we did or not, or how another acted out.
Getting rid of habits, places and people who aren’t there for you, who are toxic, just hanger outers, lack in integrity, manipulate, intentionally or unintentionally, does have not room in a love-based life.
Many have experienced some endings in the last few months. We need to realise, the beauty of this is that endings are merely beginnings. Remind yourself if you are struggling, the form has changed. Soul connection is eternal. If it is a job loss, or a partnership that has come to an end, one that was beyond your control, it has had to change, for something better. Something more in integrity to take place, one that fits our real truth than some illusion based on false promises, another’s agenda and where compromises have taken a toll. Karmic debts being cleared. Accept what is, and trust me you will come to it when you do and decide.
Holding onto the old is based on fear. Fear that we will not find or have what we want. Thinking that what was is the best we can get, be it a job, friend or partner, husband, wife, or lover. WE always have a choice.
My pet dislike is hearing anyone say they do not have a choice.
We always have a choice. We may feel powerless at that moment in time, but never no choice.
Recognising this is such a powerful way to live life.
We may not like what we are experiencing, but we have a choice with what we do with the situation, information or behaviour of another.
Taking full responsibility is also recognising that we chose to stay, to accept, to walk away, to move on, to leave, to ignore, to allow, to change…
A lover can choose to walk on, go into another person’s arms, as painful as it can be but what we do with that is ours to make.
This shift is a period of significant soul growth collectively, and personally, so it could be very uncomfortable for many in many many different ways. With fear always comes doubts — the two buddies.
Doubt is not trusting. Needing to know the answers and back to control.
Replace it with love for yourself first. Then accept the other with respect and release them. They do not need to be in your world in your inner circle. At least for now. Have them where you want to, where you feel comfortable. But perhaps in the fringes of the outer circle border? You get to choose.
Treat it like a game of chess, if they are on your board and you realise they do not fit or belong, or it hurts too much just now, or are harmful to your well being, move them. Walk-on, leave them out of your domain. Forget the guilt, if you harmed another, apologies. No one is perfect.
Sometimes also there could be displaced guilt. Guilty that if we act like we don’t care, not honour our truth, it will look or sound bad. Who cares?
Understand we are all on a unique path and challenges — this is where we release judgment; sometimes vengeful thoughts will enter, I think that is natural, but love is the only alternative medicine. Love you first, then it is easier to enjoy another unconditionally despite their choices and actions.
Sometimes what helps me is I grossly exaggerate the person in my mind’s eye, like a caricature on helium. Larger than life, blowing it out of the context of my experience, – say a conversation that was heated, biased, and hurtful or thoughtless.
I bring humour into it, see them being how they are — looking in from the outside. I Laugh at it. ‘Oh well’, I think to myself. It’s their stuff and not personal. It may seem that way.
The older I’ve gotten, the more I find it hilarious people reckon they know your feelings. They insist that you ought to have done something, feel a certain way after what happened, or ought to be feeling in a certain way after a projected timeline. Never let anyone tell you how you ought to feel to take your right to honour what’s true for you. Those who attack, interrogate and project are often those who bypass their feelings — often submerging their shadow under the influence of pseudo-spirituality or narcotics and /and toxic habits.
Seek out people who make you feel good. Words and energy do not lie despite what anyone says or not. What works for you may not work for another.
It’s like a bunch of drunks enjoying each other, but if you are sober, and they are raucous – you’re not fitting in. Be true to you.
Do not be deliberately harmful to another but do not tolerate underhand behaviour from anyone. Surround yourself where your community, family, and social folks genuinely want you to flourish, and support you. Anything else, in my view, out they go. Life and time are too short.
Pose this question, if I had only a month to live, who and what would I choose?
- Is this friend who I really want to spend time with? Does he or she add to my life? Or take away?
- Will I tolerate this behaviour?
- Is this where I want to be?
It may narrow the focus of your life and vision, but what are you waiting for?
Commit to your service in life, and follow the train of love as a practice to seeing all good things in everything. It does not mean you agree with injustices or bad behaviour, but being love is all that we are.
It is our purpose to demonstrate this in the way we can and know-how. Love always wins even if it takes much practice to live it and feel daily.
Working on the Heart chakra can help tremendously, – it removes blocks, defuses fear, defensiveness, and false comfort.
As I said, it is a practice, like any other instrument or art form. But we can choose to bring joy into our life. That is a choice.
And perhaps from that place of Joy, we can feel more loving.
© Rafah Sabbagh 2020
If you are experiencing any core issues in your life do contact me for a private session or sessions. I offer bespoke sessions according to your needs and issues. I also offer relationship coaching, with or without your partner.
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